How to collect memories after a funeral
Ask early, and make it easy. Give people one place to send photos and stories, ideally before the service so it can be mentioned there, and let them add things from their phones without signing up. Then remind everyone a week or two later, once they’ve had time to look through their own photos.
When should we start asking?
Before the service, if you can. People are thinking about them most that week, and the service is the one time everyone is in the same room. A Kept page is usually ready the next business day, so the passphrase can go on the service card.
What should we ask people for?
Photos, and one story each. A specific prompt gets more than “share a memory”: the first time they met, something they always said, a place they went together. Ask for a caption on each photo too, so you’ll know who’s in it years from now.
Prompts that tend to work:
- How did you know them, and how did you meet?
- What did they always say?
- What’s something they taught you, on purpose or not?
- Where would you find them on a Saturday?
- What will you think of when you think of them?
Where should everything go?
Somewhere everyone can reach, and that keeps it all together. Shared albums, group texts and email threads each hold a piece, and pieces get lost. A memorial page holds photos and stories side by side, with the name of whoever shared each one.
Is there a limit to how many photos people can add?
Not on a Kept page. Friends can add as many photos as they have, up to 12 at a time, from a phone or a computer.
How do we gather old prints?
Ask people to lend them, or to photograph them flat, in daylight, without a flash. Kept scans prints for $125 per 100 and mails them back, and digital photos cost nothing.
How do we keep people sharing after the service?
Send one reminder a week or two after, with the link and passphrase again. Some people need time before they can write anything, and some find the photo they were looking for only later.
What do we do with everything we collect?
Keep it together and keep a copy. On a Kept page, everything stays in one place, the family can ask for a free copy of every photo and memory any time, and when they’re ready it becomes a printed book.
Turning memories into a memorial book covers that last step.